Significant dates, limerence and irrational catastrophising

Diana Stones Songs, glass cage, Musings, Piano, whatever

Nothing like a good tagline/headline and this is certainly nothing like one.

Here is a recent piano tune from me.

Sometimes we just need someone to have a really good talk too. Especially when we feel adrift and maybe our inner voices are just not providing enough answers or posing too many questions?

This years been a bit variable so far. At lot stuff I had planned to do just hasn’t happened due to the dreaded unforeseen circumstances and some slightly sub par health due to arthritis playing up and also my ongoing mental health issues that also do slow me down a tad. It makes you tired and weary so with the best will in the world you don’t take up invitations and plans get sidelined. I had a list of stuff I started the year with that I intended to do and one of those was that I would go through my back catalogue of songs and arrange a few for live performances. It just didn’t happen.

I have stuff which only exists in recorded form where I may well have just free formed the thing to a recording and not written it down anywhere. Conversely I also have a collection lead sheets of themes but they don’t have the lyrics attached and/or the title got changed before the final version.So I have found myself transcribing my own songs almost from scratch. That’s a lengthy process and doing other things often gets in the way. It’s much more more fun pursuing a new idea to fruition and so stuff goes by the wayside.

Add to that the tiredness from poor health and my notion of trotting around a few open mics just never happened. I am frustrated with myself to a fair degree as it feels like self sabotage at times. I do spend a bit too much time maybe on social media than I should. I am introverted to a certain degree. I like people but unless I know them well I often feel awkward. if I am going somewhere for a reason like a gig I am fine but just wandering off to a place where I don’t know people is hard work. Most people are quite friendly I have found but walking through doors is difficult at times. Also a habit of talking and saying too much as in TMI where you think afterwards of god why did I tell them about that.

I have been reading up on LImerence. At first I thought it might be a small town in Ireland but no tis not the case.
Also I think I may be experiencing it right now thinking logically.

Limerence is the mental state of being madly in love ] or intensely infatuated] when reciprocation of the feeling is uncertain. This state is characterized by intrusive thoughts and idealization of the loved one (also called “crystallization“), typically with a desire for reciprocation to form a relationship. This is accompanied by feelings of ecstasy or despair, depending on whether one’s feelings seem to be reciprocated or not. Research on the biology of romantic love indicates that the early stage of intense romantic love (also called passionate love) resembles addiction, but academics do not currently agree on how love addictions are defined.

The psychologist Dorothy Tennov coined the term “limerence” as an alteration of the word “amorance” without other etymologies] The concept grew out of her work in the 1960s when she interviewed over 500 people on the topic of love, originally published in her book Love and Limerence. According to Tennov, “to be in a state of limerence is to feel what is usually termed ‘being in love.'” She coined the term to disambiguate the state from other less-overwhelming emotions and to avoid the implication that people who don’t experience it are incapable of love. Tennov was inspired to study romantic love after encountering people in her post as a professor who experienced severe heartbreak and personal perils. Tennov’s research suggested to her that limerence is normal (although illogical), and a 2025 survey suggested that as many as 50–60% of the population had experienced it.

I shall say no more and hope it goes away by itself I think.

Happy Bastille Day



Summer, Yes there is more of it.

Diana Stones Songs, glass cage, Musings, whatever

Another very warm week with various trials and tribulations. And why do people think its Ok to throw litter on our doorstep? Its kids mostly but just why?

Maybe I won’t give chapter and verse yet. I note the translobby are getting bit overheated about the whole ECHR guidance thing again. There is quiet work going on with legal eagles and such put forward reasoned arguments to Mps and so forth. But one trans group has suggested that there should be travel advisories to trans types people coming to the UK to not to come here which is a bit of a stretch. Reading between the lines there is a lot just ignore it and I will if you will in gov and elsewhere except places where there is an anti-trans gender/sex agender.. I think there is a gentle but steady tide flowing against the absurdity. Noted for example by responses from big employers and places like Marks and Sparks. I also note that the puberty blocker trail is going ahead also. Turning HMS United Kingdom on to a slightly different heading takes a while.

Well so far so good. Spiffing knees up last night, all jolly, jollys. So that was fun. Usually post gig long chat/bitching session and confessional with Claire afterwards. Told her about my absurd crush on X the unknown.

Claire our lead vocalist with Sonic Boomers our covers band admits to getting frustrated with the bands not getting more work Slightly too much beer so perhaps to much information exchanged. A bit sore today after a combination of rehearsals on Friday and very lively gig last night. It was a very warm evening. The bass player and the drummer got through 3 shirts on that gig. Allan our bass player sweats a lot, by the gallon almost.

On the home front OK ish mostly. Alisons Dr has taken her off some meds and just told her to exercise and to walk. She can walk though stairs are a problem but she has been over medicated IMO and the Dr she saw seems to be of the same opinion. Fingers crossed. I did an experiment using my large green screen sheet. Its for filming against so you can use a process to remove backgrounds, but it had an unexpected benefit. Hung across the kitchen and covering the kitchen window it actually kept the room cooler which I didn’t expect. Also i am looking at temporary reflective thermal blinds that fit in the window gap for my music room. Not pretty but may work. I played a hospital gig with Orchard and we had aircon but it was 35C outside. Thats way too toasty for me.

i now have an additional fan which cools air by misting and condensing water which is actually pretty useful. It’s really only meant for close up use but it does help quite a bit. I don’t know how long it will last, but fingers crossed.

And WTAF is this: do watch the video.

i

After The Big Heat, but it is coming back

Musings

Its finely cooled down for a few days, though we expect it to have returned by next week again. That is not a comforting thought at all. I have just about been coping, but only by remembering that I must take it very easy. plus I have my little spray bottle so I can mist myself like a flower 🌸

Yep it’s still about 26C indoors but to us that feels a lot cooler. It’s weird I seem to be waking up with aches again. I could do without that. Our place retains an insane amount of heat. Houses should have window shutters like Europe does which is good for winter and summer. I have a song I am recording, but it sparked as it’s still just too hot to get on with it, I watched a new big budget Sci-Fi film last night called ‘Hail Mary’ and enjoyed it immensely. a good investment of £7.00 and one I will watch again from time to time. I like stuff with proper story’s, not monster movies so more “what if” and also “Hard Sci fi” thats speculative but based around actual science. Though I have also watched a few indy sci fi films that were good on Amazon Prime. Often made by film/media I guess students but these days they look as good as commercial stuff as you can use 4K cameras and special effects when required that are bang on point. I do like some old 50s UK stuff that often was based on storey’s by very good writer’s.

Thinking about Russia and its proxy war on Europe as well as Ukraine:

Russia would attack Europe by sabotage. Cutting pipelines and internet cables. hacking major websites and banking, in fact it already does this and has for many years. Also by sponsoring and financing right wing agitation. It aims to weaken the west not to invade it. It still has a huge army but a very chaotic conscript/mercenary one. Its professional soldiers are smaller in number. Its Bombers very are old, and servicing them is difficult as is keeping most aviation going due to lack of parts which it must get from China or India now. It stil has fearsome nukes, which may or may not work but as we know if one is ever fired its pretty much game over. If a low yield tactical weapon is used in Ukraine then NATO will make a massive conventional strike. If a high yield one is used that’s armageddon. Putin is not suicidal and may not have as many friends as he used to. Who knows?

The Way I Look at You

Anyhow here we are again. Kids in the neighbourhood being a nuisance with the neighbours today. Looked a bit nasty. Not sure what it was all about though. I found that sort of stuff very disturbing as it reminds me of problems I had growing up so I get a bit triggered if I am not careful. The school holidays may be a bit of a problem as random bored kids roam around.

Even though it’s got cooler I have had a headache and I still feel wrecked. Never mind.

A small thing annoyed me and upset me today. Something caused by others stupidity but unsettling. I get thrown out of kilter quite easily. Stuff I can’t control.

Living in the world but maybe not just the world?

Matthew 22:20-2221st Century King James Version

 And He said unto them, “Whose is this image and superscription?” on the coin.

And they said unto Him, “Caesar’s.” Then said He unto them, Render therefore unto Caesar the things which are Caesar’s, and unto God the things that are God’s.”

 When they had heard these words, they marveled, and left Him and went their way.

Everything is a riddle….